How To Converse With A Senior Who Has Dementia
Conversing With A Senior Who Has Dementia:
Strategies for Starting the Conversation
People with dementia may have problems with short-term memory, keeping track of a purse or wallet, paying bills, planning and preparing meals, remembering appointments or traveling out of the neighborhood. And, as anyone knows who cares for or works with a person who has dementia, having a conversation with such a patient can be difficult.
While symptoms of dementia can vary greatly, at least two of the following core mental functions must be significantly impaired to be considered dementia:
- Memory
- Communication and language
- Ability to focus and pay attention
- Reasoning and judgment
- Visual perception
The decline in memory function that accompanies dementia presents a challenge; yet medical professionals and researchers emphasize the need to engage a person with dementia in conversation, both as a means of helping to prevent further memory deterioration and to keep the person socially and emotionally engaged.
Cognitive Stimulation is Important
Research indicates that cognitive stimulation—keeping a person thinking in a focused manner—is important when tending to a person with Alzheimer’s disease or other forms of dementia. One of the best ways to achieve cognitive stimulation is by helping the patient to stretch and exercise his or her memory.
As a caregiver, family member or friend, you can help this process along by asking helpful questions. In this case, helpful questions are those that are open ended, and have the potential to lead the senior into areas that might contain memories that he or she has not accessed in some time, or may wish to share again.
Finding the right questions or the right topic areas for engaging the senior may take some trial and error, but that’s okay. The important thing is to explore areas with the patient and see what does or doesn’t come up. Make sure you pay attention, so you can ask follow-up questions when appropriate; questions that may enable the patient to delve further into the memories he or she has succeeded in reaching.
Sample Questions
Here are a few sample questions you might consider as conversation starters:
- What can you tell me about the house you grew up in?
- Did you ever help your mother out in the kitchen?
- Bob will be going to his high school prom with his friends next week. What kind of things did you do with your pals when you were growing up?
- What did you do that made your parents proud?
- Was the traffic on Main Street always this bad?
- We’re invited over to Sally’s for a barbecue next weekend. Did you used to do much grilling or cooking outdoors?
- What was your favorite thing to do in the summer when you were a kid?
- Did you ever take your kids on a vacation when they were little?
- When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?
- Can you tell me anything about your grandparents?
- Dinner was so good tonight. When you were little, what were your favorite things to eat for dinner?
- What sports did you like to play?
- Who was best man/maid of honor at your wedding?
Of course, there are dozens of other questions you could try. You may need to ask quite a few before the senior responds. The important thing is to make the effort and to be patient. If your loved one engages, make sure you pay close attention. Let him or her speak and, at an appropriate time, ask questions that will encourage elaboration: “What did you do after that?’, “Did you ever see her again?”, “Was that the only time your father did something like that?”
The more that you can engage your senior loved one with dementia, the better off he or she will be, and you may find that you can learn a few things yourself.
If you are in need of help caring for your loved one with Dementia, Alternatives for Seniors is a print and online directory that specifically caters to the housing and personal care concerns of senior citizens and their families. Call our Senior Specialists at (888) WE-ASSIST (888-932-7747) or visit the Alternatives for Seniors website to begin searching for the perfect home for you or your loved ones.
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Writer: Ryan Allen
BLOG Date: Tuesday, January 5, 2016